Saturday, April 2, 2016

Apart or together? Some relationship advice

The first time when I heard about a married couple that choose to live in separate apartments was some years ago and I was not sure if I understood correctly the story. I was surprised and curious to understand why, after all they are still together as long as it seems there are details that keep them apart. The couple is still together and as far as I know they keep having once in a while some separate lives. 
This book is telling one of these stories and I was very interested to read it because of a different perspective on couple. In this case, it is about monogamous couples, married and decided to keep being together. Based on the experience of the author, it explains various reasons for such a unique step and how to create intimacy and take conscious decisions about the time spent together and other arrangements. In the author's words: 'Take a clean eyed look at what you as a couple want, need and consider best for you. And go with that'. 
First and foremost, the couple should have enough money to afford two separate homes, but once this issue solved, the common life plan follows. Another 'advantage' of the couple is the absence of children. The dialogue and better understanding on both parts are important for creating a good balance between the time spent together and separately. The book takes the apartment room by room outlining the reasons for separation and how to get together in a more natural and stress-free way. 
On a different note, this book helped me to discover how simple being I am, without too much concerns about how the books are organised - as long as the books are with me - and many other home details that I skip elegantly. 
After all, it is a matter of personal decision and couple dynamics and each and every couple knows better what suits them the best.

Disclaimer: I was offered the book via NetGalley, but the opinions are, as usual, my own.

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